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Modern fundraising among physicians.

When some doctors were told to contribute to the construction
of a new wing at a hospital, the reactions were unexpected.

The Allergists voted to scratch it;

the Dermatologists preferred no rash moves;

the Gastroenterologists had a gut feeling about it;

the Microsurgeons were thinking along the same vein;

the Neurologists thought the administration "had a lot of nerve";

the Nutritionists thought it wasn't a well balanced plan.;

the Obstetricians stated they were laboring under a misconception;

the Ophthalmologists considered the idea short-sighted;

the Orthopedists issued a joint resolution;

the Parasitologists said, "Well, if you encyst";

the Pathologists yelled, "Over my dead body!";

the Pediatricians said, "Grow up!";

the Proctologists said, "We are in arrears";

the Psychiatrists thought it was madness;

the Surgeons decided to wash their hands of the whole thing;

the Radiologists could see right through it;

the Internists thought it was a hard pill to swallow;

the Plastic surgeons said, "This puts a whole new face on the matter";

the Podiatrists thought it was a big step forward;

the Physiotherapists thought they were being manipulated;

the Urologists felt the scheme wouldn't hold water;

the Anesthesiologists thought the whole idea was a gas;

the Cardiologists didn't have the heart to say no;

and the Otologists were deaf to the idea.

Needless to say, the idea of contributing to a new wing didn't fly!

Irish Medical Dictionary